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Still – a poem for Danny

22 Sep 2020 - 2 Comments
The photographs are fading, 
Each in a careful frame
They cannot be updated, so
You remain caught in a moment, 
Still and silent, not the same
But 'no one is responsible, no one can be blamed'

The piano keys are silent
The pots of tea undrunk,
No dancing with the Minster bells
Your chuckle just a memory
And how our lives have shrunk
Unanswered questions still 

Your niece asks 'but why did Danny die?'
Unnoticed and alone,
They turned their backs on you that day
But they all hide their shame
Hopes for justice shattered
Advice met with disdain

Was your life so worthless
When you made ours so bright?,
Your body helped others live
But do they know your name
And what has really changed
For those who still remain

For they are all responsible, they are all to blame 

Today marks the 5th anniversary of Danny Tozer’s death. Rosie, Danny’s mum kindly agreed for me to share the poem she has written for Danny with you, and she also wanted to say this:

After 5 years of disappointment and distress it has been very harrowing to hear recently of continuing poor practice at the supported living house run by Mencap where Danny was living when he died. 

The same managers and some of the staff are still there and nothing seems to have changed in terms of providing careful, motivated and compassionate support to enable tenants to be safe, healthy and having a good quality of life.

Listening to families, drawing on their experience and acting on their advice is essential to any support service, as is being open about mistakes large and small.  Without effective dialogue and management, serious issues can escalate to abuse, neglect or death as they did for Danny.

We miss him every day and as always will be remembering this week the good times and what he gave to others in his passion for living despite all the challenges he faced.  We really appreciate everyone who remembers and celebrates his life, especially with a cuppa, whether or not they ever met him, and the support to us they have provided over the past 5 years.  Thank you!

2 Comments

  • Carolyn / September 22nd, 2020

    Danny , we are having that cuppa today and always for you. X

    Reply
  • georgejulian.co.uk – Inquisitorial trauma / September 29th, 2020

    […] Her son, Danny, died five years ago last week. You can read more about Danny here and read the poem Rosie wrote for him here. Rosie’s submission details how Danny died in Mencap care, and staff failed to follow the […]

    Reply

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